October 3rd Weekly update
The 21st century...
Our communication --Wireless
Our dress - Topless
Our telephone Cordless
Our cooking - Fireless
Our youth - Jobless
Our food - Fatless
Our labour - Effortless
Our conduct - Worthless
Our relationships Loveless
Our attitude - Careless
Our feelings - Heartless
Our politics - Shameless
Our education - Valueless
Our follies - Countless
Our arguments - Baseless
Our bosses Brainless
Our job - Thankless
Our income, in real terms Very Less
Quotes
I got closer to killing Osama than anyone else. And wif I were still the president, we would have got him-- Bill Clinton Fomer US President
I have to measure every word I utter. An "if" to "but" from my lips can create a national crisis-- Sania Mirza
We should look zt ourselves through our own eyes and not other people's eyes-- Noam Chomsky -- American linguist and thinker.
Bihar
Anxious to know how much mils a calf will yield I future ? Or what would be its health like ? A horoscope can tell them all. Researchers at the Birsa Agriculture Univerisyt will prepare a scientific horoscope on the basis of genes and chromosomes for milk producing cattle. This will help animal husbandry department separate high- yielding animals from low- yielding ones . Next time your cattle gives you less milk, curse the genes.
Orissa
A " walking ghost " who resides in a tree and stalks passers by ! This no Hollywood stuff. It seems to be happening in a hamlet in Khurda. Panic - stricken villagers seldom come out of their houses after dusk and talk in hushed tones lest the ghosts hears them. The tale has acquired a new dimension after a " possessed " girl prophesied that the ghost would claim 21 lives.
This one is good one
Kerala
Alakal or waves in the coastal belt of Thiruvandrum are no news at all. But wait, it is an FM Channel floated by youths for fishermen. Standard Fare is : the best price for catch, market trends, weather info, fishing innovations and the like. Fishermen tune in and some have hooked up their radios to loudspeakers for the radio less brethren.
Economics
TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies and the economy grows. You retire on the income.
BANGLADESH ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You don’t know economy. You choose one of them as the Prime Minister of the country and the other the Leader of the Opposition.
CHINESE ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity and arrest anyone reporting the actual numbers.
JAPANESE ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You redesign them so that they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow, and produce twenty times the milk. You then create cute cartoon cow images called Cowkimon! and market them worldwide.
PAKISTAN ECONOMICS - You don’t have any cows. You claim that the Indian cows belong to you. You ask the US for financial aid, China for military aid, British for technology, French for submarines, Switzerland for loans, Russia for drugs and Japan for equipment. You buy the cows with all this and claim exploitation by the world.
AMERICAN ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You profess surprise when the cow drops dead. You put the blame on some nation with cows and naturally that nation will be a danger to mankind. You wage a war to save the world and grab the cows.
FRENCH ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
INDIAN ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You worship them.
BRITISH ECONOMICS - You have two cows. They are both mad cows.
GERMAN ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You reengineer them so that they live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.
Formula 1
It would be shame if I do not talk about what Schmi did this weekend-- He was down at sixth place on the Grid , Alonso was on pole for the race after the qualifying on Saturday-- Alonso rubbed him by saying he was not under pressure as he had plenty of races to race, rather Schmi was under pressure since he was retiring and had just three races to do-- Schmi did what he is known for-- Winning-- Although there was help from Alonso's Renault team in terms of mess up on the pits for the first pit change and then a nut that failed to screw itself properly-- Schmi drove a great race and with the win, is on level with Alonso on points- two more races to go and it should be exciting for the race enthusiasts-- I missed the live action being in a stupid place that had no TV/ mobile network-- calls to peole in Chennai did not help--But I was damn sure that Schmi will do his magic- I reached home and checked the internet and as soon I saw the Red car and the prancing horse, I knew it was Schmi-- You will have to bear with this for me till the next two races are over
Hope you guys had a good time
Our communication --Wireless
Our dress - Topless
Our telephone Cordless
Our cooking - Fireless
Our youth - Jobless
Our food - Fatless
Our labour - Effortless
Our conduct - Worthless
Our relationships Loveless
Our attitude - Careless
Our feelings - Heartless
Our politics - Shameless
Our education - Valueless
Our follies - Countless
Our arguments - Baseless
Our bosses Brainless
Our job - Thankless
Our income, in real terms Very Less
Quotes
I got closer to killing Osama than anyone else. And wif I were still the president, we would have got him-- Bill Clinton Fomer US President
I have to measure every word I utter. An "if" to "but" from my lips can create a national crisis-- Sania Mirza
We should look zt ourselves through our own eyes and not other people's eyes-- Noam Chomsky -- American linguist and thinker.
Bihar
Anxious to know how much mils a calf will yield I future ? Or what would be its health like ? A horoscope can tell them all. Researchers at the Birsa Agriculture Univerisyt will prepare a scientific horoscope on the basis of genes and chromosomes for milk producing cattle. This will help animal husbandry department separate high- yielding animals from low- yielding ones . Next time your cattle gives you less milk, curse the genes.
Orissa
A " walking ghost " who resides in a tree and stalks passers by ! This no Hollywood stuff. It seems to be happening in a hamlet in Khurda. Panic - stricken villagers seldom come out of their houses after dusk and talk in hushed tones lest the ghosts hears them. The tale has acquired a new dimension after a " possessed " girl prophesied that the ghost would claim 21 lives.
This one is good one
Kerala
Alakal or waves in the coastal belt of Thiruvandrum are no news at all. But wait, it is an FM Channel floated by youths for fishermen. Standard Fare is : the best price for catch, market trends, weather info, fishing innovations and the like. Fishermen tune in and some have hooked up their radios to loudspeakers for the radio less brethren.
Economics
TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies and the economy grows. You retire on the income.
BANGLADESH ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You don’t know economy. You choose one of them as the Prime Minister of the country and the other the Leader of the Opposition.
CHINESE ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity and arrest anyone reporting the actual numbers.
JAPANESE ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You redesign them so that they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow, and produce twenty times the milk. You then create cute cartoon cow images called Cowkimon! and market them worldwide.
PAKISTAN ECONOMICS - You don’t have any cows. You claim that the Indian cows belong to you. You ask the US for financial aid, China for military aid, British for technology, French for submarines, Switzerland for loans, Russia for drugs and Japan for equipment. You buy the cows with all this and claim exploitation by the world.
AMERICAN ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You profess surprise when the cow drops dead. You put the blame on some nation with cows and naturally that nation will be a danger to mankind. You wage a war to save the world and grab the cows.
FRENCH ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
INDIAN ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You worship them.
BRITISH ECONOMICS - You have two cows. They are both mad cows.
GERMAN ECONOMICS - You have two cows. You reengineer them so that they live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.
Formula 1
It would be shame if I do not talk about what Schmi did this weekend-- He was down at sixth place on the Grid , Alonso was on pole for the race after the qualifying on Saturday-- Alonso rubbed him by saying he was not under pressure as he had plenty of races to race, rather Schmi was under pressure since he was retiring and had just three races to do-- Schmi did what he is known for-- Winning-- Although there was help from Alonso's Renault team in terms of mess up on the pits for the first pit change and then a nut that failed to screw itself properly-- Schmi drove a great race and with the win, is on level with Alonso on points- two more races to go and it should be exciting for the race enthusiasts-- I missed the live action being in a stupid place that had no TV/ mobile network-- calls to peole in Chennai did not help--But I was damn sure that Schmi will do his magic- I reached home and checked the internet and as soon I saw the Red car and the prancing horse, I knew it was Schmi-- You will have to bear with this for me till the next two races are over
Hope you guys had a good time
Comments